Funny One Liners For Facebook

If At First You Don't Succeed . . . Blame Someone Else And Seek Counseling.

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.

I told my doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.

If living in a million dollar house is wrong, then I should probably move out before the owner gets back from vacation.

Ask a question and you're a fool for three minutes; do not ask a question and you're a fool for the rest of your life

I lost my phone but found it in the last place i looked. wish i'd looked there first!!

Everyone says you only fall in love once but that's not true, everytime I hear your voice I fall in love all over again.

I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

teache; wt is d difference between call gal, gal frnd n wife....?

student; prepaid ,postpaid and unlimited.......

Truth and History involve nothing more than convincing the masses that you are right.

Confession is good for the soul, but bad for your career.
- Unless your job is being a priest.

Because one of the most attractive personality traits a man can have is the ability to use humor. Today, I'm going to give you some funny one liners to use when interacting with women.

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